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I have yet to find a decent selection of wedding dresses anywhere dedicated to those who a) want to buy something they could wear again; b) have no intention of walking down the aisle swathed in an inverted acetate hive; or c) intend to remain on Planet Earth for their big day.

That's just my two cents. Here are several more of my two cents on this issue:

I am baffled by the wedding industry. I have no desire to look like everyone else on my wedding day. I do not believe that a bevvy of my dear friends need to suffer in heels for my marriage to survive.

For my wedding, I will wear a lovely dress, in a color and style flattering to me, and my friends will do the same. We will look charming and will most likely not match. This thought does not keep me up at night.

Further, at no point on this day will I be disappointed if my guests are not surrounded by white plastic dove-shaped knick-knacks, beading, seashells or other supposedly life affirming imagery.

This is because at the end of ceremony and party, I will be living my life with my husband. To show my love and commitment to him, I do not need to spend the day in a series of cookie-cutter photo-ops, lavished with ribbons or mints shaped like roses. I don't generally need these things, and I think they are a poor way to mark an important occasion.

Instead, I would like the people I love to surround me. I want them to have a good time, and tell stories about what they love about thier commitments or why they love thier children. I can do this much more comfortably in my living room. As my living room is too small to accomodate the people I love, I have chosen a local Italian restaurant with a comfortable banquet room.

Thank you for posting this. I needed to get this off my chest. I feel alone when I say, "I don't want to wear white or pick out china." I need real things in my life, and in my experience the traditional bridal outfit avec bells and whistles and tiny rosettes is not based in a real-life experience. My wedding is my day, and I want it filled with authentic expressions of love from my husband, my friends and family. To promote this, I need comfort and genuine hospitality, and not a show.


Posted by Eve at April 3, 2004 04:47 PM