May 12, 2005
QOTD: Strip Clubs - Pro, Con or What's the Big Whoop?
I'm working on a part of my book about bachelor parties and alternatives to the traditional last-minute blowout with the boys.
I wrote about my opinions on strip clubs and my friends and I went to one during my bachelor party in Las Vegas. L had a mostly neutral opinion on the subject. She didn't have much of an issue with me going once for the bachelor party, but she wouldn't exactly want to be married to the type of guy who is as well known at his boob bar the way Norm is at Cheers.
I'd like to hear from women. What are your thoughts about strip clubs as a bachelor party option? I'm going to include a section titled "Women Talk About Strip Clubs" where I include quotes from brides and newlywed women. I'd like a variety of opinions, so are you pro, con, ambivalent or indifferent? Why? What did your groom do and how did you feel about it? Did you talk about it beforehand or did you just trust your groom to not let things get out of hand.
Don't be intimidated to respond. If you are adamantly opposed to strip clubs, I'd like to hear from you.
Email me and be sure to include your first name and hometown. If you prefer to remain anonymous, please say so and I'll respect your wish.
This will likely be the only place in the book where I quote women, so here's your chance to see your opinions in print!
Email me at groom [at] planetgordon dot com or leave your comments below.
Posted by Doug at May 12, 2005 01:11 PM
We should let our significant other hear our real opinions no matter how "stiff" they sound, espcially if its crossing our boundries on what we call personal between one another. I cannot for the life of me understand the need to look at other naked women and have them rub their bodies all over them. If you feel the need to do that, you aren't satisfied at home and you shouldn't be getting married.
don't know what the big deal is. if he goes once, fine. if he goes twice, not so fine. if he goes a lot, big problem.
While I appreciate Mary's opinion, and she is certainly entitled to it, I think it is a little overboard to compute going to a strip club for one's bachelor party with not being ready to get married.
Mary, here is a tip from the opposite gender-most of us are embarrassed to have naked women near us in public, with people watching. Most of us are going with the flow for the sake of our friends and the tradition of the bachelor party. To get overly upset about it implies #1 over sensitivity, and lack of self confidence and #2 that you don't trust us. Both scenarios are unattractive.
I appreciate everyone's comments so far and the emails I've received. If at all possible, I'd prefer it if you limit your responses to your own personal opinions, writing them as if you had never read another comment on this site. I agree that everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion, and that's what I'm trying to compile for the book.
I just want to keep this space free and open so that everyone feels comfortable sharing their thoughts.
Guys feel this need to act as manly as possible when put in a group with other guys. This might enclude talking about sports, eating, playing video games, or going to strip clubs.
My fiancee has only gone to strip clubs for bachelor parties and while I don't really like it, I know that he would only go to hang out with the guys and put on a more manly front.
Probably my biggest problem I have with it is when he came home afterwards and I did't want him to look at me. I jumped under the covers with my oversized t-shirt (that I rarely wear to bed). While I know I have a nice figure, I just don't want him comparing me to the new images of women from the club.
I want to be the prettiest woman he's ever seen and it's hard to feel that I am if I don't know what he's seen.
Do you have any interest in the thoughts of women married to other women, or are you looking for an opposite-sex-couple perspective, here?
All opinions are welcome.
I don't personally understand the hubbub a lot of women make over "porn." I get it, dudes like naked chicks...oooh big mystery boobs. Woo.
Whatever. Hanging at a strip club once in a while with the guys, or having a stack of stupid nudie mags shouldn't be equated with cheating or dumped on too hard.
I've been trying for years to get a crew together to hit a strip club. None of the guys I know are even interested. "Been there, done that." Once we ladies start putting too much emphasis on the occasion...it's like the forbidden fruit ya see? Once you tell them they can't have it all they want to do is go to strip clubs....No big deal to you? They'll grow out of it.
If not, that's what Dr. Phil is for.
I wouldn't have wanted my bachelor party to involve a visit to a strip club. I like watching strippers fine, but attending a strip show with guy friends seems like a sure way to remove any possible erotic appeal the strippers might have. I've attended some burlesque shows with Rose, and those have been fun.