July 21, 2004

Excuse Me, Do You Have the Times?

I've found myself in a bit of a Catch-22.

Admittedly, I dropped the ball on submitting our wedding announcement to the New York Times. According to the submission guidelines, the Times prefers that announcements be sent in at least six weeks before the event, in order to give their editors enough time to sift through submissions. L had been on me for a few weeks to do this and it was only on Monday, five weeks and six days before the deadline, that I finished everything up and emailed it to the Times.

So what's the Catch-22, you ask? L, perhaps only half jokingly, said she would be annoyed if we didn't get in because I sent the announcement in late. But with the Times receiving so many submissions, probably numbering in the thousands, how will we know the real reason if we don't get in? Since the Times does consider submissions sent in after the deadline, it will be impossible to know for sure.

Maybe we're not attractive enough, but I would be shocked if that ends up being the reason. It could be that we're not wealthy enough, since the Times tends to profile, if not the upper class exclusively, then a disproportionate amount of bankers, laywers and doctors. It could be that our parents are not wealthy enough, which to me seems like the most ridiculous criterion on which to make any sort of judgement about two people.

Some of our friends are convinced that we'll get in because L is a rabbi and we both live and work in New York. But after reading every last announcement in the Styles section this past week, I learned that having ties to the area has little to do with getting in. Many of the couples profiled have only cursory ties New York. Maybe they live, work and were raised in Denver or San Diego, but if their father received his MBA from NYU or Columbia, the Times puts them in.

One announcement from Sunday's paper featured a couple whose wedding was performed in Washington, D.C., where they live, work and received their advanced degrees. The bride's parents only have ties to D.C. and the groom's father lives in Dayton, OH. How did this couple get in? I've read and reread this and so far the only connection I've found between the couple and the tri-state area is the fact that all the letters used to spell "New York" can be found in the announcement.

Relationships are all about compromise, so this is one area in which I just had to do what L wanted because it was important to her. At best, I'm ambivalent about the wedding announcements. Getting into the paper because I'm getting married seems like no big deal. Getting into the paper because I wrote a funny article or did something noteworthy? Now that would be exciting.

Posted by The Groom at July 21, 2004 10:15 AM

That's crazy about the DC couple. What's wrong with the washington post. DC has no style?
It says on the website that NYT will still consider you if late, so although you may get a "U" for being tardy too often, I think you still have a shot. Good luck.

Posted by: jt at July 21, 2004 11:14 AM

Wouldn't your high-profile role as a "groom-blogger" be reason enough to consider you, absent any Nobel Prize or position as Chief of Surgery?

Posted by: Gwen at July 21, 2004 11:16 AM

Let's start a campaign! Get the Groom in the Times!

Posted by: Ellie at July 21, 2004 11:27 AM

Although she doesn't post on the site, L did ask me to clarify - she's not some crazy "I must be in the Times" kind of woman. She just thought it would be fun, and after having prepared the information didn't think it too difficult to get it in on time. She still loves D with all her heart and always will- Times or no Times.

Posted by: a very very very very close friend of L's at July 21, 2004 02:15 PM

Belive me, very close friend, I know L isn't the type of person who is completely obsessed with being in the Times or that her life depends on anyone seeing her picture in the paper.

Posted by: The Groom at July 21, 2004 02:57 PM

isn't the eyebrows-lining-up thing WEIRD?!

Posted by: jamie at July 21, 2004 03:14 PM

yes, especially because my head is MUCH bigger than L's. i look like a costumed disney character compared to her.

Posted by: The Groom at July 21, 2004 03:42 PM

lucky my groom and i are the same height (we can even share clothes!) but now i understand why all the Times photos have the guy sitting and the girl behind him with her head on his shoulder!

Posted by: jamie at July 21, 2004 04:15 PM

Hey! I'm an IB who enjoys your site. I also had my announcement in the Times. Honestly, when I was called, I got the impression that they print everything they have. Maybe that's not really the case, but my fam is from NJ and his is from the UK and none have fancy jobs - nor do we!
We did have a good story (and we consequently had that printed) but I can't imagine yours wouldn't get printed, given your website....

Good luck!!

Posted by: obie at July 21, 2004 10:55 PM

Thanks, obie! I was interviewed for the Anniston (AL) Star yesterday, so at least I'll be in one paper coming up. It will be online Sunday, so I'll post a link.

Posted by: The Groom at July 22, 2004 09:24 AM